No Milk Today

It's 11:52 p.m.

I have a 2, 500 word assignment due tomorrow that I am currently utterly f**ked for.

I have already established that I am going to be pulling an all-nighter, because unfortunately, exegeses do not write themselves. Thank you to the incredibly intelligent and considerate person who decided to make my 35% essay due in the week AFTER the final Week 13, and the other assessor who figured they'd make another one due IN THE MIDDLE OF THE EXAM PERIOD.

(Really. That was awfully considerate. Perhaps I can repay your kindness by gouging your eyes out with a spoon.)

Anyway, my laptop screen was playing up so I reset the entire computer and wandered off to the kitchen to get supplies for this horrendous essay-writing extravaganza. I wanted soup. So I went to the fridge...

...and there was no milk.

Normally, the lack of liquid lactose-based products in the fridge would not send me into a homicidal rage. However, it is now 11:58 p.m, my local Safeway obviously does not hire 24-hour-party-people so I cannot sneak out and get milk (at any rate, I'm wearing pyjamas and an oversized Oxford hoodie and that's just not a great look at any time of the day or night) and I have also just realised that THERE IS NO BREAD.

At least I have water.

But the urge to smash something is rising.

Unfortunately I was working all weekend, as is my wont, so I was unable to detect this LACK OF BARE BASICS until now.

I.

Want.

Milk.

NOW.

I'm beginning to see why everyone thinks we're the 'instant gratification' generation. But obviously these generational sociologists have never been trapped in the house without milk.

DAMN ESSAY. DAMN LACK OF MILK. DAMN LACK OF SOUP.

*sobs and pounds keyboard*

To make matters worse, I am also out of instant coffee sachets. Which means that if I want coffee, it will be, sadly, sans milk.

AAAAAAAAARGGGGGGHHHHHH.

I think that if a Scientologist approached me with an e-meter right now, my emotional levels would blow it up.

I promise that the amount of hysterical pre-exam posts will drop down after June 24th. Until then, I am going to be doing DAILY MILK CHECKS OF THE REFRIGERATOR to ensure that terrible incidents like this never happen again.