Free Intergalactic (and interspecies) love

I've been watching Torchwood recently.

Torchwood, for those who aren't quite as tragic/geeky as I am, is a spin-off of Doctor Who (and a witty anagram to boot). Russell T. Davies, who wrote most of the new Doctor Who series, is also the driving force behind Torchwood.

Let me just point out now that Russell T. Davies was also a writer for Queer as Folk, which is one of those television series that you shouldn't, under any circumstances, switch on when your parents are in the room.

Unlike Doctor Who, "Torchwood" is not family-friendly viewing. The one episode which my father watched with me unfortunately happened to involve an alien lifeform that lived on sexual orgasmic energy (three guesses as to how she absorbed this energy.) There was an uncomfortable moment of silence in the living room whilst the alien (in human form) was graphically demonstrating this process with a willing male in a public bathroom.

The leader of the Torchwood team is the extremely hot and extremely bisexual Captain Jack Harkness. Then there's your Token Asian Technical Specialist, the weedy skinny science person and the Welsh former policewoman...who's just funny because she's Welsh- "Jack, doon't doooo it, nooohhhh..."

However, it takes a very special person to become part of the Torchwood team. From what I've observed, you must qualify for the following:

1. You must be bisexual. Or if not, be willing to change.
2. You must have had physical relations with an alien lifeform. Or if not, be willing to.
3. You must be willing to encourage an incestuous workplace environment by sleeping with as many of your colleagues as possible.
4. You must spout as much technicable gibberish as possible, preferably five syllables or more.
5. You must always uphold Torchwood's reputation as a DARK, SEXY NEW CRIME SERIES.

Despite all these obvious flaws, it makes for fun, brainless viewing.

Watch it.

But don't say I didn't warn you.